We just bought our first house and are in the process of moving out of MIL's house. While living with MIL, she took it upon herself to charge my DH rent and also have him pay all of the utilities. Thanks MIL! Not!
Yesterday as I was moving stuff out, MIL told me that DH would still owe her for the utility bills that would be arriving next month, because after all, they were really for this month's usage.
Thanks MIL! What I don't get is why can't you just suck it up because we've got a whole other house's utilities to pay for!!!?!?!
Oh please. Why can't YOU suck it up? Adults pay their own living expenses, and that includes rent and utilities when they are living under someone else's roof. Why should she take you in for free? Grow up.
ReplyDeleteThis!
DeleteGrow up, poster. Why should Mommy and Daddy shoulder the burden of your presence there financially? It sounds like they helped you out and, instead of being grateful for the assistance, you bitch because they (gasp), don't want to go into the hole for you?
Please put your answer in the form of a question. - A. Trebek
ReplyDeleteThis site IS called E-Mails From Your In-Laws, is it not? Not just general complaints against in-laws.
As we said in the past, we will publish all communications as submissions are slow- recounting of conversations included. You may not always agree with the submitter- that's part of the fun of the emailsfromyourinlaws experience.
ReplyDeleteWell - then you need to move into said other house, and stop mooching off of your in-laws. If you lived with me as an adult, I'd charge you rent and utilities too (not to mention food).
ReplyDeleteHave to agree with Anonymous 5:40. If you're old enough to be buying a house, OP, you should be willing & able to take care of yourself.
ReplyDeleteWould it be *nice* of MIL to cover that bill for you, so you could get your feet on the ground at the new place? Totally. But why should she have to shoulder a larger-than-normal bill (which is because of you & your DH) just because you now have other obligations which you voluntarily took upon yourselves? She apparently allowed you to move in already--that's not enough? Sure, you paid rent, but you'd have had utilities & rent (plus deposits & probably a contract to break too) if you'd have rented an apartment--MIL was doing you a favor.
From the tone of this, were I MIL, I'd probably pay the last bill myself, as a "Woooohooo, they're gone!!" celebration.
Did you have to pay ALL of the utilities, or just your portion of them? I'd charge rent, partial utilities and expect you to chip in for food as well. Adults do that; pay your way.
ReplyDeleteThis is ridiculous. Your MIL was kind enough to let you live with her, instead of making you get a short-term apartment. Of course she's going to have you pay rent and utilities-her bills just tripled because she has 2 new people living with her.
ReplyDeleteWhy can't you just suck it up, get off your entitled ass, and pay bills like an adult?!?!?!?!
Sorry, have to agree with the others. If that was your agreement with MIL when you made the choice to move there, then yes you certainly do have to pay for the time you were there. And it would be very nice if she would pay those last bills, but if that was your agreement, you need to be an adult and keep your word. That is one of the many reasons we have never moved in with the inlaws: they have had realtives live with them and they do nothing but complain about it and then charge them for every single thing. ("Your drank a soda, I need 50 cents.")
ReplyDeleteI also agree - pay your way. I will have more sympathy with your MIL when she submits her account of a DIL who was happy to use her utilities and food but shocked that she had to pay. If you can't afford the subsidized living with your MIL, how will you afford your own place?
ReplyDeleteHonestly, I know what it's like to live with people like this. We lived with my father's stepmother for 6 months--during that time she would regularly demand that we eat cheap, horrible food that she cooked(literally, sandy collards. with no butter, no salt When you eat them they crunched you could hear the grit against your molars--and another time, she got ash from her cigarette into the bland chicken and rice she cooked), and then she'd take things--our clothes, our laundry detergent, my mom would buy a brand new container of Tide, put it in the laundry room for us to use and it'd be missing the next day. She did similar things with nonperishable foods(canned anything, pasta sauce, dried pasta, we never had any food in the house to cook even though mom actually did and paid for all the grocery shopping--it just all disappeared). My parents also paid the utility bills, and finished her house(we moved in when it was barely half built, my dad's a plumber and contractor and finished it for her--for free).
ReplyDeleteWe moved out in 6th months because she poisoned our cat and my mom was concerned about me and my sister. We then lived in a one-room apartment(studio style), all four of us, for two years, but it was better than living with my dad's stepmother.
Often there's not a lot of mentioned side things that are going on. I'm willing to bet there's more of this story than "she wanted us to pay all the utility bills for her".
What are you complaining about? You had a free ride for six months. You lived with an old woman who cooked for you and had parents that paid for everything AND fixed the house for free. You and your sister must have been a real joy to live with.
DeleteI suspect from the story that Anon Jan 26 was a child when this was occuring and that she's complaining for her parents not about them.
DeleteThat said, multi generational living is fraught with peril. Make a deal and either life with it or find another option. My inlaws lived with us for a couple of years and it could have gone spectacularly horribly on a few occasions but we talked about the issues and found a compromise.
Brat
ReplyDeleteWait, did they pay the first month? In the case, why pay the month they aren't there too? Maybe that is what the complaint is about. You're then paying an extra month's rent/utilities for nothing.
ReplyDeleteIt's refreshing to read so many people say PAY THE LADY and be thankful she was able to help you out when she needed it! Good on this MIL! Best wishes on your new adventure on your own. It takes hard work and determination. I hope you one day will be on the generous end of helping your children and spouse out.... AND CHARGE THEM THEIR FAIR SHARE!
ReplyDeleteWe paid all the utilities when we lived with my mom. Suck it up and pay.
ReplyDelete